Have you ever been in a situation where you have set a goal for yourself but actively or passively take action to stop yourself from reaching your goal?
Self-sabotage is a complex issue and there are many reasons a person may be taking steps that work against achieving their set goals. Some of these reasons stem from a lack of self-belief, self-esteem or being worried about the impact that achieving success might have on others that they care about. However, in EFT we look for the feeling behind an issue and self-sabotage often stems from fear. The fear of failure but also the fear of succeeding!
For example, very often a person might self-sabotage their weight loss goals as they feel they're not able to do it anyway (fear of failure) or that achieving weight-loss might make their overweight friends and family feel bad (fear of success). Another example of self-sabotage could be in setting a goal to be promoted but as you don't believe you deserve the promotion or you aren't good enough you may take active or passive steps to self-sabotage such as going out with friends all night before the interview instead of preparing and resting up.
EFT Tapping for Self-Sabotage
Identify the specific situation that you find yourself sabotaging your goals. Think about the emotion that you feel around this issue.
Take a measurement of the intensity of this issue on a scale from 0 - 10.
Tap on the Karate Chop Point and say:
Even though I really want to achieve ____________ (insert your goal) and part of me doesn't want to give up this self-sabotaging behaviour, I honour my ability to identify an issue and love that I am taking steps to resolve it;
Even though there is a part of me that is working against what I want to achieve, I completely love and accept myself;
Even though I sabotage my attempts to success and there is some fear around failure and around success, I forgive myself and love myself completely.
Tap on each Acupoint and make a statement to describe your self-sabotaging experience.
The below script is a generalized example so that it can fit into many self-sabotaging situations. Therefore, ensure that you adapt the script to match your own experience and make it as specific as possible in order to get the most out of your tapping.
I have added some guided questions in this tapping script that will allow you to explore the subject of self-sabotage a bit deeper. It is likely to reveal some interesting revelations so make sure to allow yourself to open up and be openminded to receiving these answers to these guided questions. It may just give you answers about this self-sabotaging behaviour you weren't aware of before.
I keep self-sabotaging.
I set clear goals for myself and have a plan.
Then I self-sabotage.
What is causing this behaviour?
Is there a limiting belief surrounding achieving this goal that is affecting my chances of success?
If there is a limiting belief, what is this belief likely to be?
I am angry and embarrassed that I keep messing up.
I feel like a failure.
Maybe it is that I believe I will fail?
I sometimes feel like giving up.
I keep self-sabotaging.
What is that all about?
Is there a fear that is holding me back?
Do I fear failure?
What would be the worst thing about failing?
What would be the best thing about failing?
Do I fear succeeding in my goal?
What would be the worst thing about succeeding?
What would be the best thing about succeeding?
What is my behaviour telling me about being unable to reach my goal?
What would be the best thing about reaching my goal?
What would be the worst thing about reaching my goal?
What would be the best feeling I might feel when reaching my goal?
What would be the worst feeling about reaching my goal?
What would be the best response from people around me when reaching my goal?
What would be the worst response from people around me when reaching my goal?
What would I be like when I reach my goal?
Would I stay the same person?
Would I become a different person?
What would be the best part of becoming someone different?
What would be the best part of staying the same?
What would be the worst part about becoming someone different?
What would be the best part of becoming someone different?
Would I walk differently?
Would I talk differently?
Would I behave differently?
If I did walk, talk and behave differently, would that be bad?
What would be bad about it?
What would be good about it?
I know that achieving this goal is what I want.
I know that I am working towards my goal and tapping is helping me get there.
I know I self-sabotage.
Knowing I sabotage myself is a step in the right direction.
I am clearer about what this sabotaging is all about now.
I understand that I am on my way to achieving my goal.
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